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| Columbia, MO BTAP Conference MVBT |
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| Entrance to LMS on Veteran's Day 2022 |
Preparing daily to teach takes several types of energy. There is the physical side of being equipped with notes, handouts, slides, and visual aids all ready to go. There is a mental side to really knowing the subject material you are to present and convey concepts for others to grasp and take hold of. There is an emotional side to being fully present, engaged, and invested in the people (students and co-workers). Each type of energy is equally important in order to be an effective teacher. I'm learning it is a continual learning process that truly isn't meant to have an endpoint. Teaching is one of those quirky professions I believe you never quite arrive and know it all. It is an evolving, exhausting, and extremely rewarding calling. I refer to it as a calling because if you disagree with what I just said you either have never been a teacher or you are one of those teachers that have stopped tapping into your potential. Yep, I just said that. We all have the potential to do something grand with our lives. Something worthy of leaving a legacy. I believe teaching and being in the classroom is where I am finding my potential and I want to share it with others.
I have wanted to be a school teacher since my college days. It hasn't been a typical road to get to the classroom for me. It's taken a lot of time and life to prepare me for the role of teacher. I had almost given up on the idea of pursuing it. This is where my faith and the path of teaching intersect. When you delight yourself in the Lord he gives you the desires of your heart (Psalm 37:4). Life has thrown me some curve balls that have challenged my faith over and over. Not just one battle with cancer, but two! After the first diagnosis in 2011 of colon cancer, I really did some soul-searching. This led to our family making some changes and eventually moved us from Idaho to Missouri. I really didn't know what Missouri would hold as far as ministry opportunities. When I left Idaho, my husband and I were helping to plant a church and serving in our home church as the Children's Ministry Director. Talk about potential. God was on the move to build something new and to build upon my foundation of faith. Through many circumstances, God led us to move here to Southern Missouri to run a small family cattle ranch. The potential to build new relationships, watch our boys grow up in a small community, and live out our dream to live the lifestyle of a cattle rancher. Shortly after being in Missouri, I stepped into substitute teaching. This led to the opportunity to coach basketball and become a certified teacher. God interrupted my first year of teaching with the second battle of cancer, with a diagnosis of breast cancer in February of 2022. In April of 2022, I underwent a double mastectomy for breast cancer. It has been one of the hardest parts of my faith journey so far.
There are many people along the path that have been a part of helping me become the person I am today. These are the real teachers who teach by example. The ones who live out their potential with a faith life clothed in love, service, and gratitude. I had no idea I'd be teaching science in Missouri. God did. God has used many life lessons to bring me to where I am today. Lately, it seems that grief and sadness are clouding my vision. This year I have been faced with family members and close friends who have suddenly passed away. My own Dad went home to be with the Lord in April. I think about him often. A good friend of ours, Levi Woodhouse passed away suddenly at the end of October. If you want a true-life example of what a friend, teacher, a pastor looks like take a look at his celebration of life services. Levi's legacy of love will continue. It has been once again an opportunity to use some of that potential faith of mine. Our time here on Earth is short. We must take every opportunity to share Christ.
I have found the quote by Gary Blair, former girls' basketball Coach at Texas A &M to be true, "There is never going to be a day that won't require dedication, discipline, perseverance, and personal integrity." If you didn't know this all ready here is your warning: life is hard. We all have struggles. How dedicated are you to the life you are living? I don't always feel like doing what is required of me. Shocking right? I still do it because I am dedicated to my calling. There are hard conversations that happen on a daily basis. Confrontation, when conducted in love, can offer constructive criticism or words of affirmation to encourage a student to keep working hard, or maybe a phone call home. Tricky as it may be, finding the right words to say isn't as hard as how you say them. I have a phrase I use in my classroom and it goes like this: Say what you mean, mean what you say, don't say it mean. I stole that from a sweet mentor friend (you know who you are!) Having discipline means you do the daily grind and then some, all the time, every day. I know what it means to persevere. I'm a fighter, a survivor. Pushing hard even when my physical body or emotions fight against me. On the outside, it may look like I have it all together. I don't want to pretend like that is true. I do struggle more than I want to admit. These past few months have been tough. I have been through a lot of physical and emotional changes. My emotions have been acting like a pendulum swinging from side to side over and over again. So much potential energy is wasted on anxious thoughts and unanswerable what-ifs. Who am I when no one is around? What thoughts do I think? What music do I listen to? Am I being careful with my words? Personal integrity is a huge non-negotiable for me. It really is about your core values and beliefs. Why do you believe the way you believe? Can you defend it? Who am I?
Life tends to jade a person. One can choose to squash all the potential faith by heading down that downward spiral of self-pity, depression, and discouragement. Remember faith over fear. I will be having surgery on Monday, November 21, 2022. This is the final procedure in completing my breast reconstruction and plastic surgery from the double mastectomy. The surgery will be in St. Louis at Barnes-Jewish Hospital/ Washington University. Recovery should not be as long as the last time. I plan to return to the classroom quickly. My faith is strong and I am eager to finish this part of my journey with cancer. Surviving cancer has really impacted my faith and caused me to analyze my motives and purposes. I hope you can look at some of the hard things in your life and come to the same conclusion. We may not understand all the why's and timing of it all but we can trust in a God who does.
"Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen." Hebrews 11:1
Remember
Promises
Everything Will Be All Right.
Give Me Faith
Fear is Not My Future
In Jesus' Name
God Only Knows
Battle Belongs
Because He Lives
God is With Us
Believe For it
You're Going to be Okay
Too Good Not to Believe
God, Turn it Around
Speak to the Mountains
You Are Not Alone
Fighting for Me
Praise You in this Storm
Warrior
Youtube Playlist of the above songs.
"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9
I will be posting more updates once the surgery is completed.
